Just had a conversation with a dear friend and we experienced crystal clarity in those moments and all the sufferings have been lifted off but realized i forgot most of the things we spoke of, there’s no specific purpose of this post, but well, just felt a need to.


It’s been a messy period. I’ve not felt this lost in awhile. I’ve come to realize and recognize what is different about the way I’ve been for the past 2 weeks and when I’m feeling absolute joy, and giving love and light to others and seeing the good in others: responsibility. I used to recognize the power of choice we had, the personal responsibility we all carried to be happy. For the past 2 weeks I’ve been living in the future. I bought into a story of the future, like “someday soon I’d be back on my feet, I’d be okay”. During my moments of greatest absolute joy and giving was when I lived fully in the present. Everything I did was from Now. I told myself that at least for this very moment I can choose to be happy. I can choose to hold gratitude.

Gratitude and gratefulness are two different things. Gratefulness is when we are given something and we are grateful for it. Gratitude is what we hold in the heart, from pure love. We hold gratitude for everything, the goodness and the challenges in life. We hold gratitude for all because we know that everything that we see and feel and experience is exactly what we need right now for our deepest growth. Gratitude is a state of truth. It is appreciation of all things because all things are divine, all are connected.

And in living in the present moment fully, I lived from pure love. I saw through others and saw the divine part of them that is the same as me, their humanness that is inseparable from mine, I saw how interconnected we all are and I saw the good of them and saw through all the shallow ‘negative’ sides.

Our happiness is a personal choice. It is impossible to go a day smiling, dancing, humming a happy tune, singing a song and still feel unhappy inside. Our emotions follow our actions. Our actions are determined from the current ‘story’ we’re living in.

When life is throwing a lot at me I always remember one thing clearly: all is darkest before light. We can never find ourselves if we never get lost. Trust in the dark and the light.

The only way through is from harbouring and acting from pure love. All else is unreal and will fade away. We recognize that everyone has their own challenges, their own battles their own growth. Everyone will learn the lessons they have to at their own pace and situations.